chapter 34

Dinah was out playing with the local girls and got raped by vs. 2: Shechem son of Hamor the Hivite. EQ. He told his dad he wanted to keep her.

Jacob heard the story and waited for his boys to return from the fields. They were outraged. Not only was she raped but by someone outside the family. That was very bad conduct.

Hamor tried convincing Jacob and the boys that they should all be friends and intermarry.

Obviously, he knew nothing about the holy family of sheep herders.

Hamor agreed to pay any bride price.

“Give me the girl. Please.”

“What, so your son can stick his uncircumcised penis in her holy vagina.”

“What.”

“If everyone cuts off their foreskin from their penis, then it’s a deal.”

They decided to go for it. Seemed like a fair deal. What’s a little skin off a few penises compared to the added wealth of the city through the advent of a tribe of sheep and goat herders.

So they did it. The cutting off of the foreskin. Not, however, the intermarrying part.

While all the men and boys of the city were lame with pain, Simeon and Levi walked in at night and killed every male. Put them all to the sword, as they say. Then they plundered the city. Took all the herds and flocks and all their children and widows. Anything and everything.

Jacob told his sons that they might be causing trouble. Other city states were sure to hear the news.

Vs. 31: “Should our sister be treated like a whore?” EQ.

Here we must note that rape does not make a woman a whore; a whore, by definition, is one who receives payment for the use of his or her body for the pleasures of sex. And the raping of a whore is still rape. In case any morons missed that.

And plundering a city and making all the women and children slaves after murdering the men, who in good faith on the agreed treaty cut off their foreskins from their penises for the crime of one man is also, well.

Fucking insane.


chapter 35

God told Jacob to take his plunder and new slaves to Bethel. So Jacob collected all the alien gods and buried them. Told everyone to change his clothes.

Everyone feared the genocide freaks, for some reason unknown to your humble narrator.

In Bethel they built an alter, called the place “The God of Bethal”. That’s were Jacob had talked to god 20 odd years earlier.

Deborah died. Was buried. Who was Deborah.

Jacob was reminded by God to call himself Israel. He didn’t catch it the last time. Was too concerned about not eating hip meat.

And God also reminded Jacob that he was God Almighty. And like so often, and it will be repeated every few chapters until God goes away.

Be fertile. Make a great army.

And Rachael was dying giving birth to the 12th son. Her second.

Vs. 17: “Have no fear, for it is another boy for you.” EQ.

Reuben fucked Bilhah, one of Jacobs concubines, and Israel found out.

And a fly landed on a sheep shit.

Isaac died and Esau and Jacob buried him.

“Eat me, this way, the end.” Jim Morrison


chapter 36

This is all about the descendants of Esau, otherwise known as Edom, most likely because it’s nicer to be an Edomite than an Esauite. Just guessing.

Esau and Jacob had far too many flocks and cattle and servants and slaves and soldiers to live in the same land, so Esau took his clan of clans to Seir. Again.

Esau had a Hittie wife, a Hivite wife and a cousin wife from the slave son of Isaac, Ishmael.

If the names are of interest, check the original. However, just because it is a tedious list of names does not exclude it from the possibility of being fiction.

And if there is any truth in it, it doesn’t matter hundreds of generations later. And one more point, less we forget, even if it was mostly true, it still would not count as holy.

The real that we are now learning through discovery is much more grand. The earth has had humans for more than a million years. And human like creatures for several million years. And before our ancestors were primates, as we still are, they were something else. And before our ancestors walked on the earth, about 600,000,000 years ago, they were, we were, living in the oceans.

And our make up. That which we are, the cells, our every thing about us. It is all very intermarried. Over and over since billions of years. About 99.5% of every human is exactly the same as every other human.

And no, not because we all come from Noah, or all come from Adam. Simply because life is all one thing here on this little planet. Evolving by reincarnating millions and millions and billions of times. Like it likely was in the last universe and the one before that.

Just so you know.


chapters 37 - 39